Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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