But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
