Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Did you just throw up mid-sentence?

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  (202): Did you just throw up mid-sentence? http://tfl.nu/vo8s
  Replies (2) Good night (1095) Bad night (760)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?

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  (314): Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent? http://tfl.nu/oc2y
  Replies (20) Good night (1039) Bad night (2033)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...

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  (870): She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again... http://tfl.nu/jy0r
  Replies (18) Good night (5000) Bad night (1565)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes

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  (718): you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes http://tfl.nu/46zk
  Replies (9) Good night (769) Bad night (2811)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.

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  (616): Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson. http://tfl.nu/7vwr
  Replies (16) Good night (1169) Bad night (4647)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.

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  (515): In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much. http://tfl.nu/n8ik
  Replies (7) Good night (1940) Bad night (1036)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred

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  (508): Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level. (508): I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred http://tfl.nu/piwf
  Replies (10) Good night (2655) Bad night (1035)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?

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  (914): Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday? http://tfl.nu/1qeg
  Replies (4) Good night (535) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.

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  (808): My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever. http://tfl.nu/qc0x
  Replies (6) Good night (1043) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.

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  (262): Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God. http://tfl.nu/qyus
  Replies (2) Good night (603) Bad night (302)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win

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  (425): I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win http://tfl.nu/52ex
  Replies (5) Good night (646) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?

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  (913): speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall? http://tfl.nu/3y98
  Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (305)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.

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  (610): Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college. http://tfl.nu/99u6
  Replies (2) Good night (1398) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (657): View more from California

  Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot

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  (657): Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot http://tfl.nu/2wlc
  Replies (3) Good night (627) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  went out last night. woke up with a lisp.

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  (805): went out last night. woke up with a lisp. http://tfl.nu/64b5
  Replies (4) Good night (240) Bad night (227)

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