I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
my liver is dry heaving
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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