I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I just made out with a guy for $7.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
