i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize