Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
