So drunk its hurt
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize