"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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