no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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