i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
