I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
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