Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
