i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize