Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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