if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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