Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Randomize