your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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