I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
