I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
