i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
