dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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