haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
