She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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