Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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