Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize