One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
