Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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