how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
