Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
