I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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