Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize