sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
