1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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