It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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