I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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