fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
