Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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