tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
