i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Do vagina's smell?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
