You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I just want nice things and good sex
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
