then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
