after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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