You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
