she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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