I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize
