ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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