was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
