does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
