well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
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My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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